We have something to SAY.

In June 2006, the most painful and traumatic event took place, my mother’s sudden death and my father being jailed as the cause. After extensive deliberations in court, meetings, and assessments my father was pronounced NCR MD (not criminally responsible medically) and transferred to mental health institution in 2008.

For twenty years, my father’s diagnosis was schizophrenia. He was given an assortment of medications to help him cope, some more hazardous than others. More recently, a new team of psychiatrists determined that my father suffers from schizo-affective disorder and provided him with the proper medication to help keep him regulated.

Thirty years ago, and being of South Asian (SA) descent, the words ‘mental illness’ were very foreign to our family and other members of our community. It became increasingly difficult to reach out to fellow SAs as the notion of a mental illness is taboo, embarrassing and not openly discussed as there is a real stigma associated with the illness. As a result, my father suffered alone with his illness. He was out-cast both by friends and the community at large, even though he was a successful entrepreneur and a leader in the community who helped fellow SAs ‘get on their feet’. In his times of prosperity, people were around. In his times of need, no one was around except immediate family

As a young child living with my father, I witnessed the afflictions of mental illness destroy a very successful career and his spirit, instigated by the lack of understanding and acceptance within the community. Furthermore, he experienced the limited resources and accessibility to assistance and support. My father was in a very dark phase in his life and entered into a deeper depression. He became more confused and fearful as the illness took over and he was losing control of his mind.

By 2005, he was clearly helpless and struggling to overcome the illness.  Collectively, as a family, we shared the responsibilities in admitting our father for treatments, much of it short term. Visiting various institutions, hospitals, doctors, psychiatrists, and emergency wards was a very common part of our life and it became a continual revolving door to find the correct treatment program. My father suffered from psychotic episodes, some more extreme than others and with every visit or admission he was administered a new experimental drug. Noticeably, my father was left to his own devices to cope, yet he needed better care and medical management. It was very unsettling and in June 2006, a tragedy took place - a psychotic attack that this time, instead of harming him, it caused a fatal attack on my mother.

As you will read from the many articles below, mom’s death shocked the community and it became headline news. It was very difficult for the family to cope as in one terrible moment we had been stripped away from having both parents available to us. My father was imprisoned for an undetermined time. He had to endure both the horrors of prison life and living with the tragedy that took place caused by a mental illness that controlled him.

I realized at that very moment, it was going to be a difficult battle to have him removed from prison and it was always my greatest fear whether he would be able to survive as his spirit was completely broken. He was subjected to a violent environment and somehow had to learn to deal with his unfamiliar surroundings. One in twelve people[1] incarcerated in Canada are suffering from some form of mental illness –my father became one of these statistics.

It has been almost 11 months since my father’s transfer and he is truly a new man. I hear his soft-spoken words, and see the glimmer in his eyes and life re-entering him again. His treatment staff tells me how well he is doing and the fact he is the leader within his ward and how he inspires and motivates others to openly communicate about living with their mental illness. He also encourages the patients to participate in the various extracurricular activities. I’m amazed that my 67 year old father has learned basic computer skills, plays volleyball and leads the healing group discussions, cooking classes and so much more. I am grateful to the centre’s dedicated staff for my father’s rapid improvement and to him for progressing so rapidly, fighting his way back from such a dark period in his life.

In our current visits, we speak about the SAY Campaign (www.saycampaign.com) which in some way he has inspired me to launch with Geeta Raj, my US colleague, who shares a similar story. It was the issues that he addressed in his letters to me and in our discussions speaking about stigma, alienation, education, accessibility and treatment. He offers us strategy on how to go about raising the profile of mental health care, the various related illnesses, funding initiatives and breaking down the stigma that exists within the SA and other communities.

Despite having known him all my life, I am still amazed and inspired by how my father has endured the shame and stigma of being labelled severely mentally ill, the indignity of being committed to prison confinement, and finally having to confront the awful consequences of his actions while in a psychotic state.  Despite these adversities, he has emerged wiser, gentler, and motivated to help all those around him.  He has truly “transformed” himself.

Thank you again for the opportunity to share the experiences of my father who has battled his mental illness with great bravery and courage.

Sincerely,

Lina Dhingra